Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
Just tried my new showerhead. Sex with Brian will never be the same.
your ability to fuck hot guys even when you go out in sweats amazes me
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
These pubs in Ireland act like hand jobs aren't the universal currency
You left me with no money to have random Chicago sex. The least you can do is pick me up an egg mcmuffin on your walk of shame back to the hotel.
I was kind of torn between "Wow, this is awkward," and "Wow, my therapist is hung."
I may have tried to encourage people to play a new game I invented last night. I called it Super Quarters. Like regular quarters, only using an AA medallion.
i just had to pick up my 18 year old cousin from the police station for hosting a party, and i had to do this stoned wow
I was so high I watched a 5 minute video of different scenes of horses running. The music was magical.
i need some magic done to my vagina
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
It'd be good to change things up a bit, right now the only public service I'm doing from my apt is hanging out in my underwear with the lights on.
Randomize
