..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
Hemmingway ran to paris to avoid going to the university of illinois and becoming a doctor. It was there he developed a drinking problem. I need a plane ticket.
I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
So I woke up today with someone's door knob in my pocket. I hope everbody else got out of the house ok.
it's like your virginity...sometimes you have to pretend like it's still there
he came in the shower with me...i thought it was going to be nice and romantic...until he started peeing on my leg.
It's like we come as a package. Your slogan should be "be in my family, sleep with my roommate."
My slogan can be "bonding the family together. One dick at a time."
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
If your boss lets you sleep on his couch, you don't pay him back by boning his daughter.
He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
Deciding whether to take my sex toys home for Christmas will be the biggest decision I make this holiday season
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
He set the tone in the back of his car by blasting Marvin Gaye's sexual healing before railing me
Randomize
