ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
Also, did that cop draw hearts on everyone's hands last night?
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
Don't bother coming over to clean the mess. I already paid two kids 5 bucks for it, just didn't tell them you peed all over the place. You do owe me 5 bucks though
Is it bad if one of my goals right now is to snort blow through a licorice?
Don't answer that. It is bad.
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
next time we make out at a concert please try to refrain from screaming out our hotel room number.. the amount of guys that knocked on our door after you passed out was ridiculous
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
Got a minor my first day of college from the bike police. I'm gonna like it here
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
Well waking up naked, covered in Chex mix is not how I planned to start my Wednesday if that's what you're getting at.
I've decided I will have no shame for the things I don't remember doing.
It's an interesting experience to pee while a bird meows at you.
You need to get out of the house more
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