I need help removing her.
I swear if I see one more guy in a v-neck and fedora I'm going to punch someone in the balls. This is philly, you're not supposed to look like Ryan Cabrera
totally got the gold medal for the best fence jump when the cops came.
I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
Today's lesson: while in the shower, one should choose between either drinking OR shaving. Not both.
Ohhh, TODAY your worried. Becasue last weekend when we warned you about her you said "shes too hot to have herpes."
He was carrying a rolled up carpet saying he was saving it for tomorrow's Walk of Fame.
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
how exactly do you say, "i only agreed to meet you for breakfast because i thought we could go to your place and fuck afterwards."
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
Well, I crapped my pants in front of her entire family, was laughed out of their house, and I had to walk home with shit stained pants. So, yeah, it went really well.
Always keep a stash of tequila in your work desk. That is like adulting 101.
Hurricane Harvey ruined my dick appt. WTF?!
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