It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
I found out you can't leave the bar with a drink. I also found out that pouring it on the bouncers shoes is also unacceptable.
Seriously... Things should be way more awkward... The entire female half of the bridal party INCLUDING THE BRIDE blew me in high school....
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
At first I was horrified but then he explained that he shave a "soul patch" on his balls... And I was still horrified, but I went with it.
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
I get dinner and bf perks from the one guy. But dick with no commitment from the other. I’m living my best life.
its like i just tried to scrub the hangover off of me.
Oh god I just had an orgasim riding my bike. I need to get laid pronto.
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
Just fell out of the attic onto the garage floor. Okay but might go for an x ray. Smashed one of the kitchen drawers to bits.
Holy Shit Mom
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
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