i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
my one-armed grandma is doing the YMCA. you figure it out.
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
grown man stumbling drunk down green street wearing nothing but a hot dog costume and crying. its not even noon yet.
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
He's bringing condoms over for me in case we "bone".... the fact he calls it boning is not a great start.
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave.
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
No, it's okay that he's on a date. I attach no more emotion to him than I do my vibrator.
So here I am, sexting at work.
If I get my period the weekend your parents are gone i'm removing my uterus.
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
Randomize
