used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
Car fucking is for special occasions like birthdays and bank holidays. Don't want to lose the magic by making it an everyday thing.
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
mowing the lawn. still drunk. If my dad doesn't appreciate this I swear I'm dissowning everyone including him
i watched you ride a mechanical penis. nothing is awkward between us anymore.
He couldn't stand on his own, but he managed to somehow to get to the beer garden and get served 3 more. I'm proud to call him my cousin.
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
How was my weekend? I just blew my nose and a gram of coke fell out. My weekend was fantastic.
Jesus christmas you are like the Martha Stewart of threeway planning
You told me that you were mad me because I wouldn't let you 'explore my castle'. Then you said I smelled like a hospital and passed out.
So far I've taken two naps, went out and bought a pizza called the Hipster, and in 15 min I'm gonna make a snow angel. Conquering Snowlandia. How bout you?
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
The sex was so good I feel like I could run a triathlon, hit big at the casino, and defeat ISIS.
I'm sorry about the fire. I was too fucked up to do science, apparently.
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
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