I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
Apparently I kept telling the bartender that I was going to set the Guinness World Record.
Dude. She told me she felt bad for not giving me more blojobs. HOW COULD THAT HAVE GONE BETTER?
5am is far to early to be on jagerbomb number 6 right now
dude he was laying on two half-naked chicks, as they rubbed him down with lotion, while rolling a joint. hes like a modern-day african king
duuuude the clock in this car says its 85 past 19.
dear god, who put you in a cab?
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
Ur dog was like a damn middle school chaperone this morning trying to lay between us after what he saw us do last night
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
At least I'm fat on the outside. You can NEVER change being fat on the inside.
Was so close to hoppin on it but then I realize it's not a dick and I needed to keep walking. Primal instincts.
I woke up while eating peanut butter from a jar. I don't think I should be social today.
Only the sound of Friends and my gulping of wine are masking the sounds of my roommate getting laid