i woke up under my mattress pad with him laying naked next to me and his wwjd bracelet on my nightstand.
nice, that's exactly what jesus would do.
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
he wanted me to dress up like someone from lord of the rings. I dumped him.
he peed everywhere. it's like having a puppy.
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
your goal of the night was to unlock your iPhone with your nipple. You're going places.
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
Well since its impossible for me to swallow a pill this big I'm making wine slushies out of them
If he thinks that that is an acceptable way to ask me out he is out his goddamn ginger mindddddd.
I felt so bad but my urge to be with you & drunkenly eat your face was apparently much stronger.
I found a picture of me as a little kid with nothing on except a towel covering one of my nipples and I'm glaring at the camera. Literally nothing has changed except I have boobs now
I can't believe i lost my ID... bringing my birth certificate to the club was a weird experience
Going to give your dick a friendship bracelet.
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
it was the most awkward makeout ever. it was record breaking really
...i feel like you have a lot of those.
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