I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
All I have in my fridge is chocolate cake, pizza, spicy mayo sauce, beer, and weed. I love college
Please tell me you're throwing the cats into this foot of snow.
he's the only person i know who can drink himself into and out of alcohol poisoning.
OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND
Turns out he's old enough to be my dad. I'm so excited. I've never had a sugar daddy before. What should I ask for first!? Want anything?
I just wanna say I did some math and I lasted 1,052,000 more minutes than you at the bar before I got kicked out. That's 729 days. Bitch
They said you bought the guy a shot and was talking about being Greek and then all of the sudden just puked all in their pitcher of beer and got kicked out of the bar.
He wants to buy me a drink to apologize for sending me a pic of his dick. Welcome to my life.
I've now spilled wine and got poptarts all over my cast. So much for my doc taking me seriously...
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
Would you still love me if I got a Whatever Forever tattoo? It's like the Emo kids' Live Laugh Love
Randomize
