Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
I'm really sorry I gave you road head last night and made you drive over and break the sprinkler system.
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
Thanks man, but unless some hot chick comes in to work with a case of beer and offers me a head job, I'm pretty much screwed for New Years
You screamed "show me a dick stand!" But before I could ask you wft that was you had passed out in the corner
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
Apparently I had 2 bloody noses and after my sis put me to bed at the hotel, I escaped and my sister's friend found me in an elevator with some guy
I shamewalked barefoot this morning and the Dos Equis delivery guy judged the shit out of me.
dude wtf why are there forks in my wall
does "I AM MAGNETOOOO" ring any bells, because that was you for an entire hour last night
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
I think I just got booty called by someone I've never slept with or even really had a conversation with before.
So I forgot to ask, how was that bartender you slept with two weeks ago?
Google chlamydia.
I know her cup size but not her name....
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
Pro tip: When you spend the afternoon banging your boss, don’t meet your mother-in-law for dinner if you still smell like cum and watermelon flavored lube
Randomize
