We video chatted for almost two hours. But I woke up with puke on my keyboard. The question of the day: were we still chatting when I vommed? No idea.
How are you feeling today?
i could've thrown up on command at any point today...
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
There's two girls at the bar sniffing each others boobs.
Come over and play the Jeter 3000 drinking game. You drink if the commentators say "captain" or "3000". I'll drink if they say "overrated" or "past his prime".
he spent an hour trying to convince us that Ted Nugent is Kid Rock from the future. by the end of it i was very close to believing him.
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
I have no idea, but there's a bus parked in front of my house and like 6 texts saying im gonna prove my love. this is either really really awesome or really really bad.
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
He pulled the pencil out of my leg and then we fucked. It felt sorta like pulp fiction in reverse.
In the middle of me riding him, he stopped me and said "You're the kind of person who would be restrained for being obnoxiously drunk on an airplane, huh?"
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
You told me you didn't want to go to the hospital because you were drunk, but because you didn't want to leave the "fun".
Randomize
