i just saw a guiness commercial where the guiness was on the verge of spilling the whole time. i was on the edge of my seat scared shitless. im an alcoholic.
Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
Please don't die.. At a gay bar... On a Wednesday. Obituaries are not allowed to be that entertaining.
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
Almost to my house to grab beer. And pants.
Where were you last night, and why am I not surprised that drag queens were involved?
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
They started shooting fireworks out of a dryer. It was my cue to leave.
And that is why I love you so much. You have the same cold black heart as me.
listen I need taco bell and an orgasm within the next hour. I'll leave the order in which you provide those things up to you
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
Randomize
