those bitches were sniggering at my man-pris like they were goddesses of fashion!
...dude i pray you are quoting something, someone, anyone...
i dont remember who you are as you are in my phone as "mr. peanut."
What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
i just sold back the books i vomitted on
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
His thanks his mom for not having an abortion at his wedding toast. I love frat weddings.
Not sure why, but I was running back and forth across the road. Cab hit me and gave us a free ride home.
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
Here’s how sick I am. I’m not hungry. I don’t want coffee. And I don’t want dick. So, you know it’s bad.
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
Randomize
