dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
In hindsight buying the pill crusher with my vicodin prescription might have been too much.
Don't try to dry clothes in the microwave. They'll catch on fire.
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
We are, if nothing else, classy enough to leave our 10 mini bottles of wine in a polite line on the floor of the movie theater.
Lying on this bed is like lying on love and marshmallows and joy
Some guy offered you 100 bucks last night to suck your toes. I had to drag you away while you were yelling at me, "Stop money cock blocking me!"
That's just where I'm at in my life.
I know what you meant. If you want babies in time for your birthday, we gonna need either a time machine or a ski mask.
I can say with absolute certainty the only time we ever had a civil conversation was when we agreed we both liked pizza.
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
My mother expressed her concerns about my drinking via a facebook message.
I broke my dick don't ask me how I need help putting in a catheter so I can piss.
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