is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
True love is taking a shit with the one you love in the bathroom with you.
and my herpes radar will keep us safe
I am more sore today than I was after my car wreck. Take it as a compliment that you bang harder than a semi-truck.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
OH GOD PAJAMAS ARE SUCH A HARD CONCEPT RIGHT NOW
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
my sober ride is dancing w/ a fat girl. i might be awhile
My radar detector detects ice cream trucks. I think it was made for stoners
NOLA update. Went to Corey Smith at the house of blues last night. Drank PBR and took lots of shots of Jack. Too drunk, cabbed it to the hotel and fell asleep while having sex. Not my finest moment. Now I'm in court. I can't wait to be your attorney.
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Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
He called my vagina "the man cave", and I found it charming
I think the best course of action at this point is to cut his balls off to get him to stop reproducing
How does one take the "you're the best sex I've ever had but I'm marrying someone that's sub-par in the sack" mind fuck?
I pity the fool.
Thanks Mr T.
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
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