it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
Oh and then this old man who saw it happen goes "don't do that"
Hahaha what a helpful old man. Like you thought it was normal to be spilling gas everywhere.
So we tried to 69 with him on top. NEVER TRY IT. His balls were in my eyes and it was terrifying.
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i have to start hiding my credit card when i drink i woke up this morning with 4 emails from Farmville telling me i spent over $800 on coins last night
he asked me to put his condom on because he couldn't see without his glasses
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
He ripped off his shirt and tried to give me CPR. That damn bong.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heβs Upset Because People Told His Mom
She told me my pubes were as soft as "fine wool"
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
I was up all night on suicide watch. Dave was wasted and tried to strangle himself. With his own hands.
it was just another one of those moments where you unfriendzone a friend you assumed to be gay
Good news!! I can adult!! π turning down the strip club on a weeknight has become my crowning achievement ππ
MY DINNER LAST NIGHT CONSISTED OF SEMEN AND A PROTEIN SHAKE... MY TRAINER WOULD BE PROUD I DIDN'T HAVE CARBS!
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