you just used a box of cheese-its to get into the bar
He's a navy seal. He can stick it anywhere he wants.
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
I'm calling into work with a wicked case of sledge hammer crotch. She has to understand
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
Also, beer. Big fan.
But really- as the voice of your vagina I am BEGGING you to do it. If not for yourself than for your poor innocent puss
dude I just found tht weird ass guy u invited last night passed out in my closet.... apparently he "couldn't find the exit"
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
I'm gonna play this game called Conquer the Dicks. I think it is self explanatory.
You told the guy in Wawa you needed his hoagie for "a scavenger hunt" and then called him a "fuckstained Muggle" when he didn't give it to you. You are a delight.
Drunk Karaoke resulted in only 8 injuries this time, so there is some improvement.
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
I wore a bathing suit downtown so I didn't have to put on underwear, I obviously don't have my shit together
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
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