Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
He is such a slut. More and more my type.
guy from last night has fluorescent crocs in his closet. judging by the rest of his clothes he doesn't wear them in an ironic way
No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
I don't know how God could bestow someone that emotionally confused with such an awesome penis.
I took my vicodin with tequila. I can FEEL gravity...
My roommate just called. He's in Miami and has no idea how he got there. He also has a ticket to Buenos Aires that he can't explain. I figured you'd have the explanation.
If you're trying to piece together your night, I can tell you where those tassels came from.
It was so weird. She left to go to the bathroom and her older sister leaned towards me with a creepy smile and said, "You don't deserve her" and then continued to stare at me with a crazy expression for the rest of the evening.
That's kinky shit dude.
If your mother gets up on the bar again, I will. The bouncer already had a talk with her earlier.
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
Made eye contact with a friendly neighborhood dog walker while violently puking out the window. How's your Wednesday going?
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
Randomize
