is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
Important detail I forgot to tell you: leprechaun loves david bowie.
I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
i just opened the overnight bag i packed at 2am last night. Apparently all i thought id need was a handful of quarters, mascara and one sock
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
Naturally, I just peed all over the floor. Two guys in front of me looked at me, but i just shrugged. They won't remember either.
Kayla got stiches in her face. Rode in an ambulance shotgun. Tried to steal a baby, thought it was mine
He screamed "Hug me!" and dove into the bushes. How he gets laid every weekend is beyond me.
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also I had a dream we made my birth control into a joint. What does that mean?
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
Yeah.. I'm sorry I broke your phone. But in my defense you handed me the frying pan.
Shut the fuck up. It's not the end of the world. Now come get your asshole bleached with me or we're not roommates anymore.
Holy shit, just saw a girl in the library smoking a bong disguised as a calculator
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