i think my tv is drunk
that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
my 3 year old cousin just woke up screaming "IT WON'T GO DOWN!'
She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
just took a pee in my own yard...decided i had to poo..only got a dingle berry....wiped it away with my finger..help me...my mom AND dad are home.
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
She came to the party with six kegs and a life sized portrait of Lavar Burton. SHE WILL BE MY WIFE.
I just masturbated to a Jock Jams cd. What have you done today?
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
They better not charge my debit card for what you peed on.
There's a potato with a bite taken out of it in the kitchen
So high that I just walked into class, late, sat down in my desk, and tried to buckle my seatbelt.
No one can explain why there is Dora the Explorer shampoo in my shower...
He had a tattoo of the Batman logo around his asshole. I noped right the hell out of there.
Randomize
