..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
i just checked to make sure valentines day this year was on a weekend assuming ill want to be drunk all day
hearing about your life makes me feel so good about mine
You've picked up chicks by quoting metal bands
When they're drunk they believe it's Shakespeare...enjoy the simple things
if tampons were more like dildos the world would be a better place
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
UPDATE: lighting the grill with Bacardi. Haven't slept. Forgot the hamburger buns. Almost out of our eighth handle.
I just burped smoke on the bus. Hello 6:48am
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
dude my grandma just called my dealer. How does this shit happen to me
My roommate just walked in with a case of beer locked himself in his room and told us he was going to masturbate his feelings away...
I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.
And also the fact that I woke up sandwiched between two gay men is probably fueling my day
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
Randomize
