We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.
ya and he came three minutes into it because he didnt have sex all summer
oh that makes more sense i knew you arent that good
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night.
Don't you realize there's more to life than sex and pizza rolls?
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
You said that when your ex gave you a blowjob her mouth was like velvet
i am one UTI away from banning your fingers from my vagina
Like I just asked Greg why I don't have a crown for my vagina. That drunk.
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
After finding out he was married when we were together, I don't trust him.
My one night stand ended up seeing me the next morning... For my interview. Guess who got a job.
i've got three words. i. was. spanked.
Randomize
