grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
He's at the gym. He likes to get high and swim cause it makes him feel like a fish.
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
We planned for the zombie apocalypse. In great detail. Of course there was booze involved.
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave.
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
I am not exagerating when I say the thought "screw you future me" actually just went through my head
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
She sent me a video of herself sitting in the car stone faced listening to the Titanic song on silence. She won't answer my texts.
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
Pretty sure I scared her away last night by putting a vodka tampon in my ass
I don't know who he was but he was covered up with a shower curtain and ate a whole bottle of tums
Randomize
