there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
I'm not sober enough to be having a conversation about a rap she wrote in Spanish about public safety
was just hit on by a homeless lesbian. forever alone.
I was wondering if I fell or perhaps got hit by a truck, then I remembered, it's cause I did a splits contest at the bar
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
You definitely in your drunken state were really concerned you would forget to buy milk today
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
Next time I think buying tan-thru bikinis is a good idea, remind me of that time I passed out in one and burned the epic shit out of my pussy.
When was that?
Yesterday. Bring aloe. For my pussy.
mom had to come pick me up from the hotel. I crawled to her car. She told me the entire way home if I puked in it I was going to lick it up. Like high school all over again...
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
I'm making mistakes. Coming up with girl now
I hate me. That girl was hiiiiideous.
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
Randomize
