he thought i was a dude.
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
I don't have a choice really. It's either lose 15 lbs by Halloween, or I'm going as a giant banana.
Was waiting for the adderal to kick in then realized I had been brushing my teeth for eighteen minuites
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
My head. My head is the problem. Also alcoholism.
Weve literally been going out drinking five days a week. That counts as a full time job right?
I'm having flashbacks from last night. Did I admit to pausing Whitney's funeral because I was watching porn? I believe I did.
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
I don't know. She kept pirouetting across the kitchen while making dinner. I just sat there stoned.
I feel like vibrating beds are just synonymous with venereal diseases.
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
Do not ever look at a picture of an erect ostrich penis. You will regret it.
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
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