Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
its a long story involving jim bean, an owl, and a knife
I'd like to say yes, but I nearly lost my shit when I assumed there was no back to my house. I am not strong enough for hallucinations.
Lead with your genitals is the best advice I can give you.
Obama's speech on in 9 mins. Me in the shower now. Naked. Make your choice.
I'm bringing the tv in with me.
Last thing I ever expected to say, "Get your finger out of my ear or I will stop sucking your dick."
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
If I'm not drunk and wearing a penguin hat by the time we are done opening Christmas presents then coming home for Christmas was a complete failure
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
He flew in from NY last night. We had sex in the back of my car in the airport parking lot and then he fed me fresh Babka (from Breads Bakery) as I drove him home. I can't decide if I love him or Babka more.
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
We fucked while The Odyssey played in the background. Homer would be proud.
She's so high she just screamed into the pile of takeout boxes "which one of you gave me diarrhea"
I’m at that point in my trip where I’m kinda hot, kinda cold and I have to remember to breathe.
Randomize
