he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
Always fun waking up to 911 as your last dialed call.
Your beautifulness. Funnyness. Sexy hairness. Coolness. Plus you ask google how far wendys is from your house. Will you marry me
I'm sorry i ruined our friendship with a boner
I vaguely remember trying to exfoliate my face with your leg hair. Sorry about that.
Hey. Hey you. Just wanted to let you know that I'm adorable. FUCKING ADORABLE. That is all. This update brought to you by our proud sponsor bud light.
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
Apparently chalking everything I've done these past 48 hours to the fact that it was homecoming, is like a "get out of jail free" card.
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
Sorry for yelling at you, I'm just really emotional about missing comicon.
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
Mmm vodka always tastes better when i know i have work at 8am
It wasn't until after we began having sex again the next morning I realized I didn't know his name.
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