the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now.
Bro, i just sang journey's "dont stop beleavin" at mcdonalds. and the guy was sooo impressed he gave us free food. God i love america
Sorry I had passed out by this time I think, with the chicken fingers ON my face in my bed, with all the lights on, and ketchup all over.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
quick, send me a pic of a fat chick eating ice cream in a bikini. no joke, no questions, just do it.
and a jello shot exploded in my bra last night. Now I have blueberry smurfette boobs. Awesome.
Its mothers day, andI woke up with 12 bar stamps on my face, holding orange juice and a box of tampons. This can not be happening
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
So now I can cross "have my ass be someone's phone background" off the bucket list. You know, if it was something I actually had wanted to happen.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The fake number she gave me was for Pappa John's. Now I have a large pepperoni on the way.
he threw his shirt and suit jacket out the window of the uber going home
How do you get the "hangs out with drunk assholes" insurance
I just swiped right for a guy on Tinder solely because it looked like he was holding Zoboomafoo
I'm going to make you a sign to put on your penis to ward others off
I had to give myself a suppository. That was the LEAST fun I've had inserting things in my ass.
Randomize