dude, despite what happened last night, I'm not gay
I thought he was gonna sex me but then he ran to my bathroom and jerked off
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
I can't believe you're fucking in the bar bathroom, but everyone else can, and they're really proud.
You can't be mad because the taco bell people like me and not you. I'm not the one that puked in front of them.
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
My ex's new gf is pregnant and he is sterile, so 2016 is starting off well.
MY BUTT IS BIG ENOUGH FOR AN ANACONDA AND HE DOESNT GET TO ENJOY IT TOUGH SHIT
At one point my little brother was Rocky Balboa'd by a stripper's tit
It's one of those "I can't stand you but we're stuck in the same hotel room tonight so let's fuck until one of us passes out" kind of nights.
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
I always know im high when I can't remember how to pee.
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
Randomize
