Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
do you think there was ever a doctor who smelled his finger after giving a prostate exam?
she was so "full of love" from watching twilight that she came over and gave me a handjob. when does the next movie come out?
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
He's having sex with his gf again. Every thump of his bed against the wall is insulting to our one night stand.
Beer Popsicles are better in theory
I just had a contest with the toilet to see who could hold their breath longest.
I won
If you're wearing dry underwear your day is already better than mine.
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
FUCK YEAH PUPPY BOWL
can we not speak foreign languages when I'm on drugs
HE’S PUKING UP BLOOD
okay all good I mistook strawberita for blood...
I'm reading the Hobbit in my blanket fort alone with a bottle of wine... all I need is dungeons and dragons to complete this superfecta of awesome
I have blood and BBQ sauce all over my shirt. I blame you for the blood.
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