i totally forgot about the coupon that said i would show him how i pleasure myself.
I'm going to show my kids 2 girls 1 cup just to scare them away from porn
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
I'm not going to need your "it doesn't mean you're a slut" pep talk after all.
There are pre-booty call contracts for a reason. I have no intention of calling you tomorrow.
Do you need my fax number or something?
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
Well you tried to pay for a drink with your keys for one...
New Halloween costume idea: Frankenstorm. We have three hours. Make it work.
OMG. Dad just threw a 100 dollar bill down on the table for a girl to lift her shirt. I think he was kidding, but...
Do you ever have one of those days when your breasts are just fucking awesome?
He’s really fucking cute. Like, I want his penis in my mouth cute.
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
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