Have you finally orgasmed yet?
Just made my alarm the Lion King song. Too excited about waking up to sleep.
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
It's legal now for me to leave my boyfriend and marry you.
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
I love that my idea of a romantic gesture to you is to send you a picture of my vomit saying "wish you were here". You voluntarily dated me. For six years ish.
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
People were wondering why I started hanging out with him after high school, the simple answer is now that I don't see his dorky ness everyday I can just focus on his amazing penis.
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
Took my nervous poop earlier then expected it's gonna be a good day
Dad is wasting no time getting back out there. Just walked in on him and a Twin Peaks waitress in the hot tub
Randomize
