bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
I will forever be haunted by the image of you hurrying to finish your Jimmy Johns sandwich in the Taco Bell drive thru so you could proceed to order $17 dollars worth of shitty Mexican food.
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
Ugh he's texting me.
Tell him you're no longer interested in what he has to offer; his shitty personality outweighs his sexual prowess.
I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.
He told me to be careful with the shrooms because he mostly had caps left. He sounded apologetic but that's the best news all week.
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
He texts me "just to say hi" and then tells me how hard he is and sends me a dick pic. And I'm like, dude, I'm ordering a burrito right now
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
I'm laying in bed cuddling with my teddy bear and eating waffles. I need a fucking boyfriend
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
we should paint friendship bongs
Randomize
