So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
when i came out to my mom, it was over brunch. i was eating a banana. not exactly my smartest breakfast choice.
listening to the two girls in the next stall finish a 40 and laugh at this guy they both fucked. they're calling him 'tulip dick'.
If you don't come out tonight, who's going to wake us up in the morning because they're fucking in the middle of the room where everyones sleeping?
Well at least he is okay. If you call the fetal position in my living room floor "okay"...
Carrying your underwear around in your purse on Sunday morning is its own religious experience
I'm waiting at the bar and am surrounded by unattractive women.
You need to get here and rebalance this disturbance in the force.
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
where did we go last night? there's dollar bills all over my room & they're all wet.
Look, road flare archery was agreed on. We both accepted it was a shit idea sober, but did it drunk anyway.
Mom got drunk as hell, crashed Dad's wedding and some how left with the best man. This is why you should be glad you aren't my sibling.
she passed out standing next to the car. her head hit the door so hard the alarm went off. she instantly snapped out of it and started sprinting away
The guy i took home was a circus freak. He jerked off 3 times in front me after we had sex. And he came every time.
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
Randomize
