yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
gotta love it when a reminder comes up on your phone and u think u forgot about a meeting or something then u read it and its only to remind me to go to the titty bar at 3
The worst thing about having a parent with a prius is that they can walk in on you without any warning
Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
A-plus on my thesis. I deserve the blowjob to end all blowjobs. And I wanna wear a crown while you do it.
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
We see some guy emerge from the forest on the island this morning, alone, in only a snuggie. Morning shots and bagels on us for the number one walk of shame.
If we can't get laid at a bar crawl, we should just quit life.
OK. i'm going to add "riddle me this, brodawg" to the list of things i'm never gonna say to my boss again while i'm high.
I just got a job offer for Australia. Unfortunately I have given the name of Whitney
Right as the plane left the gate the brownies kicked in. I dont think the guy next to me appreciated my engine noises as we took off
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
The important thing is that she is gone, presumably back to the depths of hell from whence she came.
WTF I can't even get a boyfriend here and you're getting nudes from across the country
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
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