In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
So, i took all the condoms from his nightstand, not in the crazy ex way, but in the I paid for them way.
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
It's okay, I found my phone in the toaster oven. Logical explanation: 5 martinis
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
Got home last night and found a Big Mac in the shower, tampons all over the place, and two pairs of your panties on the front porch.
Oh yes there is. Now I'm the sad one. Please organize my life. And I will demoralize yours.
I'm too socially awkward and sexually frustrated to get through this evening sober.
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
Have you ever looked at someone and thought…oh honey, you're too pretty for an ankle monitor
Did I just pee in the Taco Bell parking lot?
Yep. But do you remember wiping with my quesadilla?
Randomize
