I'm going to shit on something weird... I can't wait
I told you I would drunk text you sometime........its that time.
you washed your face with toilet water last night.. i tried to stop you but you wouldn't have it.
how do flat chested girls get laid?
I awoke in a cab to find myself on a ride to niagara falls. Apparently I paid the cab driver half up front.
4 random people called me telling me they found him sleeping in the fetal postion on a driveway 45 minutes after we lost him
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
Just called my dad drunk from bed to ask for bacon.. my niece texted me when it was ready.. i'm never moving out
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
Dude I just realized i did a camper walk of shame in front of amish people. I should have asked for cheese and a home made pie to cover it up. Im just lost shopping in amish country nothing to see here
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
Randomize
