at this rate if someone im actually interested in likes me back im going to die of surprise before i even get to make out with them
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
We call it lazy sex. We just lay next to each other and help each other masturbate. that way we can both be on bottom.
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
They let me close the tennis center alone. It's a 6-minute drive from 2 of my booty calls. Scratch tennis court bj off the bucket list.
I have discovered my latent superpower. If a friend is dating a bi chick they will inevitably try and talk me into a threesome.
I screamed so bad because I thought he was going for my sandwich forgetting it was in my hand
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
ever had one of those days where you say fuck it and lick the inside of a bag of chips
So I woke up alone in the hotel room clutching a bible to my chest. Explain, please.
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
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