Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
I hope you have a really shitty weekend. I love you.
you turned your livingroom into a bong?
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
Ok, Jen and I are going out tonight and getting rowdy. I think you and Steph need to come. I understand if you can't, but not going out means you're automatically obligated to post bail. If necessary.
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
I took an adderall. This is weird. My eyes are really wide open and I am really good at staring. I've written on 9 peoples walls and updated my status. I am getting shit DONE!
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
I did not appreciate your texts about spanking at 3'o'clock this morning.
I just got hit with cramps and found a mystery pill. I'm gonna stay put for an hour and at least see what happens.
It's 90 percent alcohol, and 10 percent a whisper that says "get drunk"
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
Next time I pee on a car, I'll text you.
Randomize
