I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
i need gas-x and some way to take back every single thing i did last night.
you rubbed the head of my dick and said "I shall call you Squishy and you shall be mine and you shall be my Squishy."
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
As soon as he lost the election, the reception's open bar became a cash bar. I have never been so disappointed in my countrymen.
he's washing the lighter in the sink and telling me to picture unicorns. requesting backup.
Can you explain to me how i got kicked out of a bar last night, from outside the bar?
His wife found out about our affair the same day he got fired for it.
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
This is why Helen Keller didn't drink
I fell asleep masterbating while watching family guy... This is what happens when girl's night gets canceled
REWARD BLOWJOB!! STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE I'LL BE THERE IN FIVE MINUTES.
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
The tequila monkeys have a drum solo in my skull right now. I can't imagine Emily feels better.
Randomize