i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
I wish there was a non-hangover washing machine that I could stick myself in right now
I couldn't tell if those girls from the bar were lesbians or just awesome
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
I'm soaked in beer, and I think blood. Why did we think we could tap a keg with a hammer?
Just gave a gay guy pointers on how to make anal not hurt. Reevaluation of life choices: in progress.
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
There's a Russian guy here. In the bar. Drinking vodka. Wearing a trench coat and a hat and a mustache. Idk where the confusion is.
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
I apparently insisted on hugging all the bushes and apologizing for pollution on the way home.
How was the party last night?
I'm dangerously close to shitting myself.
Why did you make me get in the car with you and then not give me a ride? I woke up in a bar with a blanket on me.
He was literally going down on me and giving me a foot rub AT THE SAME TIME. What more can I ask for?
Sorry 4 always trying to rope you into my sexual exploits
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
Randomize
