you sent me 45 texts saying "meow?"
did i?
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
Not enough. Tell the person next to you to give you their drink. I give you permission. And then chug it. Be a hero tonight.
Party was cancelled. Me and my dog are high as tits. Wanna go roam the outlet mall?
I want to reach into my vagina and rip out my uterus with my bare hands. Understand how much it hurts now?
This hurricane was the perfect excuse to buy 2 pounds of animal crackers and a case of beer. It's on Sandy.
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
"willing to pay anyone fun whos willing to hang out and laugh at my jokes while my friends are MIA" is this to desperate?
cops tried arresting me on the way to class this morning.. this is my life.
I needed tweezers to get my thong out of my ass this morning.
Went to 7-11 to buy condoms with the $20 I found on the ground outside Rite Aid. A good day for drug stores
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
I fucked your neighbor. Welcome to the new apartment!
Self care is breaking into nasa and launching yourself directly into the fucking void
Randomize
