Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
Sometimes I kiss girls just to make them shut up.
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
A girl limped into my class 15 minutes late wearing sunglasses, leggings, and a kiss me im irish shirt. She sat down and took her glasses off and im pretty sure she only had one eye's makeup still on. Someone had a great st pattys day.
I think her version of saying goodnight was being flung over a guys shoulder as he said, "Bitch. You don't need no shoes."
I just found my "random bang list for summer of 2012" that I wrote last night.. It's written on a Plan B receipt. If this isn't irony I don't know what is.
I am in his childhood bedroom and I feel like his trophies are applauding me and his stuffed bunny is disgusted with me. Did you know he was a mathlete?
Called my ex last night, told her I wanted to bang like we use too, her fiance was in the car, I was on speaker phone. NO MORE TEQUILA!
Did she say Ok?
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
The only thing I remember last night was feeding my dog 4 McDoubles.
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
he just fucked me for my cheese..
tonight...tonight im having sex in honor of you
Just showered and cleaned every bit of sex off of me cuz i have a feelin my stepmom has jesus powers and would be able to smell it on me
Randomize
