i just walked by a road side game of beer pong? it's gonna be a long day
i don't think my family understands the severity of a twenty first birthday.
I'm gonna laugh so hard when we're both married with families
That statement alone makes me laugh so hard.
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
Let's have a moment of silence for the guinea pig that drunk chick threw out our window.
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
I forgot to tell you thank you for putting me out when I was on fire. im sure I'll laught about this someday...
oh dont worry, my liver will give out way before i get skin cancer
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
HOW THE FUCK CAN YOU NOT REMEMBER WHIPPING IT OUT AND PUTTING ON THE BAR?
By the way, you're banned for life.
You FaceTimed me to show me he was sucking your tit
The chances of me making out with someone next weekend are about the same as me not remembering it.
You do realize he's just an extension of his penis, right?
Things that have happened since you moved: Lemmy, Bowie, Snape, Prince, civility, democracy, Carrie Fisher, all dead. Record flooding down here. Twice. This is clearly your fault.