I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
So my mouth tastes like dick. Does that explain how our talk went?
i purposely bought her a small sweater. My way of saying, you've gotten fat.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
one of the cashiers from Kroger is eating at my kitchen table and nobody knows why.
yeah except there is a correlation between drinking moonshine and going blind, which kind of concerns me
Her vagina smelled like pancake batter. That's all you need to know.
Hey, what did you end up doing with those ski goggles?
Anything is possible. I didn't even know I was wearing the toilet cover as a hat
You proceeded to get into a playground school bus and yell "all aboard to Margaritaville!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just jerked him off with one hand while holding my wine glass with the other and watching Congo. I feel like this was a preview to my married life...
We're at an agreement where I don't pry and she pretends blissful ignorance
wait. i have to tell u something. and it has nothing to do with dildos or spiders
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
Uh oh. Put down the vodka cancel the clowns and get rid of the donkey
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