New discovery: conditioner is better for jerking off than baby oil. Fuck yes.
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
At this point I just want to meet a man with a job.
she crawled under her car and passed out. Unfortunately her feet were sticking out and someone called 911 because they thought she had been run over.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Meeting relatives from another state drenched in tequila and smelling of weed. I'm gonna kill you for soaking the only bra I brought in Jose Cuervo Gold.
I give him a gold star every time I orgasm. His room looks like he's freaking King Midas.
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
i was debating whether to load antoher bowl when i realized i was holding a sandwich in one hand and a cookie in the other. and laughing.
only thing in my fruit bowl is 4 champagne corks and a jenga piece . Tuesday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's in a nude suit, bald, with a pink headband and a black sharpie streak down his forehead.
They put paint on their hands and tried to see how many times they could touch me before I woke up.
Judging by this purple one they got to second base.
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
i had to call the bar to ask if they found my bowling ball. That good of a night
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
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