its not stalking. its research.
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
Okay good. And who the fuck put a condom on my foot. That shit hurt
I remember desperately screaming that I love my life and running in zig zags all the way home
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
She said we "made love." I had to explain to her that when both parties agree that the first time time they have sex both people agree to video tape the whole thing its not "making love" but more like random good time fun sex.
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
Fun fact. I am at the police dept. getting served a warrant for unpaid ordinance... and the officer was a one night stand from like 10 years ago.
I think curling is the best thing to watch when you're baked.
Oh man 11pm. That means it's time to take my shirt off an eat a brownie
I fell asleep in the bathroom during my mothers dinner party with no pants on. Her friend walked In. I was told to not come back.
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
The awkward moment when you're leaving the most attractive guy you've ever been with and you're trying not to shit on yourself. Fucking welcome to my life
About the whale....I wasn't completely awake.
Randomize
