we have officially lost it.
Everything went well, until I walked into his bedroom and there was a Ronald Reagan poster watching over his bed - creepy
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
Hypothetically, how much legal trouble do you think i will be in for stealing someone's dog?
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
You were demanding water from a bottle but I didn't have one..so I just took the water bottle from the hamster cage. You're welcome.
I legit just woke up on my couch, snuggled up next to some guy who's wearing my roommate's pink bathroble. What the fuck do they put in those shots?
We ended up debating which Food Network host would do best in porn.
The worst thing about him living around the corner is that who ever suggests the booty call is the one that walks over.
Apparently mr clean magic erasers don't clean blood off the ceiling
My general physician told me i have the emotional capacity of a 2 year old, While he refilled my xanax prescription. That's service!
I swear, the guy behind me wasn't paying attention until the words "middle aged fuckboy" came out of my mouth.
It was very surreal. They were listening to a religious podcast on morality while they both went down on me.
Randomize
