I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
alone in the kitchen at 4 am eating a hotdog.
Just drove past a church with a sign near it that said, "God wants to be your daddy."
she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
smell my finger.
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
i'm pretty sure i saw my life flash before my eyes when we ran a red light. i continued to drink and be the drunk backseat driver.
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
I woke up this morning with a pop tart under my pillow with one bite eaten. Another pop tart was in the floor. No recollection whatsoever. I ate the one under my pillow for breakfast, though.
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
Look I'm really high right now, and if I were to leave this house, it would be for the sole purpose of getting an ice cream sandwich. So can you please just do it.
Went on a blind date. Afterwards I ripped my pants off and said "it's game time". He was into it.
He kept referring to my giving him head as a new level in our relationship and acting sentimental
You gave him a bj, not a kidney
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
Randomize
