She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
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He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
I mean, yeah, she was cheating on me but I've been fucking her brother. My secret relationship trumps her secret relationship.
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
Judging by my bruises, I know I took more than one tumble. I probably pulled u down w me, and then punched you in the knee. Been trying to find a place to fix my phone between naps today. Almost no place accepts hand js as currency these days. 2013 is gonna be expensive and whorey.
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
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I woke up in a bunk bed beside two Brazilians dude you have no idea how happy I was
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
I just used my dick as to measure where my desk would go because I don't have a tape measure or a ruler.
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
Actually, I may scrap this entire plan. I just realized that I had sex with a guy with his own whiskey commercial.
The condoms have been found. I repeat: THE CONDOMS HAVE BEEN FOUND. he isn't a collector!!!
I'm glad that we laid to rest the suspicion that he was keeping them in a scrapbook. yayy
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